My ovaries are rockstars...

Talked with the nurse last night after they got all of my bloodwork and ultrasound results back.  There's actually four measurable follicles on each ovary, plus an additional 13 per ovary that are growing.  :::pats stomach affectionately:::

The rest of my bloodwork looked good, too.  I don't really understand it all, but I'm going to try and have some of my IVF buddies and the nurses explain it to me.

Yesterday, I had my first acupuncture appointment in St. Louis...it took nearly two hours.  She spent the first hour going over my diet, exercise, supplements, stress management, medical history, fertility history, etc.  Then she spent the second hour actually stickin' needles in me.  It was by far the most needles I've ever had...I lost count at 20.  I felt great afterwards, though and she even convinced me to bring Nick in next week.  And more importantly, Nick didn't balk when I told him as much.

May have overdone it on the eating healthy yesterday...I did not feel well last night at all.  I'm finally starting to have some bloating and discomfort, but I drank a ton of water and took it easy on my super fiber rich shake this morning, so I feel a lot better.  That's probably a lot more than you want to know about my fiber intake, but I don't care.  I could talk fiber for hours!

I thought I might get bored but my schedule is pretty jam packed next week between appointments, acupuncture and seeing all my STL friends...which is perfect.   I do have to save time for some special projects I'm working on for my mom and mother in law.  Mom - if you're reading, SEND ME THE ADDRESSES!  Also, love you.

In case you're wondering, Carl is also Just Fine although I'm pretty sure he now associates me with painful peeing and my brother/mom/dad with SALVATION!  Alex sent me this video to prove it.  Thank God my family are all cat people (no offense to dog people...it's just that cat people are infinitely superior, you see).

I've got a question...part deux

I intended to do a second FAQ last week, but instead I was distracted by alcohol (happy hours!), drugs (in my refrigerator!) and coffee (my shiny new Keurig -if you were here right now, I'd make you a cup of coffee!)  But, here it is...the much anticipated second installment of Sarah Answers Questions You're Probably Thinking But Won't Ask.

Let's get started...

Aren't you nervous this won't work?
I wouldn't say I'm nervous so much as wracked with fear and absolutely petrified...and yet also...strangely optimistic.  Nick would probably say he's more nervous than optimistic, but I cheerfully try to bring him to the glass half-full side every day (i.e. preemptive Father's Day gifts!).


What happens if this cycle doesn't work?
I suspect there will be a lot of tears (me), stamping my feet (me) and self-pitying (Nick) going on.  There's really two possible scenarios.  Scenario #1 is that we don't get pregnant this cycle, BUT we produce enough viable embryos (that will be frozen if not chosen for the first transfer) that we can do what's called a Frozen Embryo Transfer (FET) at a later date.  We actually chose our doctor specifically for his FET rates of success, which are equally as good as a 'fresh' cycle...that's pretty unusual and worth the extra effort on our part to do a cycle out of town.

Scenario #2 is That Which We Don't Speak Of...I'm only kinda kidding.  In this scenario, not only does the cycle not work, but we also don't produce any embryos for an FET.  If that happens, well, that's just a bridge we'll cross later.

Sarah - aren't you concerned at all about how your cat children are going to react to their new brother(s)/sister(s)?
As a very responsible cat owner, yes, yes I am.  We spent years waffling on whether or not to have children because oh my god, you guys, what if Carl and Zoe don't like the babeeeee?  And what if they think we don't love them anymore?

I'm only kidding.  I suspect the cats will treat any new addition to the house much like they do a new piece of furniture - half-hearted interest at first quickly turning into boredom and then indifference.  And they might pee on the kid(s).  Whatever.

Sarah - what kind of amazing, awesome, sweet surprises does Nick have in store for you while you're in St. Louis getting poked and prodded every day?
You GUYS!  You are so thoughtful.  I don't know, but I'm sure whatever he has planned will be really, really good. (she says without a trace of menace at all).

Is Nick prepared at all for the onslaught of hormones that are going to course through your system in the upcoming weeks? 
All signs point to yes, as he already appears to be acting extra special nice by helping out more around the house, giving me more snuggles (I love my snuggles!  Nick's going to kill me for writing this!) and just generally going out of his way to be helpful (i.e. my super awesome color coded Excel spreadsheet for medications/injections).

I want to read your blog, but I am too busy and important to check it every day to see if you've written another literary masterpiece.  What should I do?
As a fellow busy and important person, I appreciate where you're coming from.  If you look over to your right at the top of this page, you'll see a box that says "Sign Up for Super Awesome Email Delivery"...enter your email address and then you'll receive notifications when a new post is up.

Are you insanely excited to see the final installment in the Harry Potter series?
Do you know me at all? YES.

Are you going to make Nick take you to see it while you're in St. Louis?
Most likely.


Are you devastated now that Oprah is off the air?
I don't want to talk about it.

Thought for the day...

True love is...making a detailed, color coded Excel spreadsheet of your mate's medications and injections, including dosage and size of needle. :)

Blame it on the alcohol...

You know how if somebody tells you can't have something, it just makes you want it more? Or is that just me?  At any rate, after June 21st, I'm supposed to eliminate alcohol completely and HOPEFULLY won't be able to drink again for quite a long time...nine months or so.

But knowing that I won't be able to have it soon has made me crave it now.  It will surprise some of you (particularly those that know Nick and I from college) to learn that we don't really drink that often...maybe 1-2 drinks a week, tops?  (Sidenote: we're officially old.)  But since I learned that liquor and I were not going to be friends anymore, I've had more happy hours than I care to share here, PLUS I've got several 'Sarah's Last Drink for the Hopefully Foreseeable Future' outings coming out with various groups of friends (Bristol, Avenues and Piropos next week!)

One happened a few weeks ago, when I demanded politely requested that my girlfriends go out and do karaoke with me.  So, our host Jill had us over for drinks and snacks and then (once we spend about an hour and half arguing over whether or not we should take cover because of a tornado watch) we went to a magical place called the Red Balloon.  I think calling this place a dive would be a compliment. 

Have you ever seen a movie where a guy walks into, like, an old-fashioned saloon-type bar and the saloon goes silent?  That's pretty much what happened to us.  I'm not sure they are using to seeing women with their own teeth women as attractive as ourselves.  We caused quite a stir.  After waiting what seemed like hours and enduring the World's Smallest Toilet, we finally (after I bribed) got on stage and sang..."We Built This City" by Starship.  Two bars in, we cleared the dance floor.  I guess there weren't a lot of 80s music fans in the place that night.   Then, later, we snuck in one more...something by Madonna and they literally took the microphones out of our hands and kicked us out (although I think that's because the bar was closing, not because we were that bad).   Because we're responsible, nobody drove home and we all had a slumber party.  It was a lot of fun...thanks so much, girls! 

Lemme ask you a question...Part 1

Blog Law...it's not a real blog until you have a Frequently Asked Questions post.  Actually, I have been getting a lot of questions and I thought it might be easier if I answered them in one handy dandy post.

So...how's this whole IVF thing work? (ed. note: I am not a scientist, I just pretend to know a lot)

An average  IVF cycle lasts about two months; there are several different protocols that are used, but the one our doctor has recommended is called 'long lupron'.  For the first month, the only medicine you take is the birth control pill (I know - it doesn't make any sense to me, either)  After that, my ovulation is artificially suppressed using a drug caused lupron.  After the suppression, I'm given injections to stimulate the production of eggs on both ovaries.  Obviously, if you paid attention at all in health class, most women produce one egg per month.  The stimulating drugs (or 'stims' as IVFers in the know call them) cause a woman's ovaries to produce multiple eggs (we're hoping for anywhere between ten to twenty).  The eggs are then retrieved from my ovaries (I'll be under anaesthesia) and then a process called ICSI (intracytoplasmic sperm injection...say that five times fast) takes place, where essentially one sperm is injected into each egg, creating an embryo.  Next, the wizard adds an eye of newt and says the magic word.  (Just making sure you're paying attention!) (Also, I really like parentheses.)

After the embryos mature for a few days, they are transferred to my uterus and we cross our fingers, toes and anything else that can be crossed, that the embryos 'take' (that's a scientific term, by the way).  I could pretend that I looked all of this up in scientific journals and periodicals, but truthfully, the best summary I've found so far of IVF is on wikipedia.  Don't judge me.  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_vitro_fertilisation

Are you going to be like that crazy Octomom lady? Or that absurdly tan lady with the vaguely Flock of Seagulls hair (Kate Gosselin)?

In the sense that I may have a lot of hormones coursing through my body for the next couple of months and making me crazy, yes, possibly. In that I have more children than fingers, no. 

The Octomom did undergo IVF and her fertility doctor implanted far more than the recommended number of embryos each time she went for treatments, hence the octuplets (the doctor is losing his license as a result).  Kate actually did not undergo IVF...she used Intra Uterine Insemination and a fertility drug called Clomid...her ovaries became hyper-stimulated and she ended up with the sextuplets as a result.

Folks, I will not be having more babies than I have hands, that's just all there is to it.  The math's all there - two hands, two parents, two cats, two adorable Mizzou onesies (ya gotta start 'em young).  Our doctor will not implant more than two embryos, which is JUST FINE by us.  So, the most we would have is twins.

Except,when you read the fine print, there is a REMOTE (and I mean remote!) chance that one or both embryos would split and then become either triplets or quads.  But, it's a very, very small chance, so we'll just cross that bridge when we come to it, if we have to. (:::Backs slowly away from the post:::)

Why are you doing your fertility treatments in St. Louis? Is Kansas City not up to par? 

Because we like to make things as difficult as possible and I have just gads of vacation time that I wanted to eat up.  In truth, this is the ONE TIME where I give credit to the eastern side of the state in the the great St. Louis vs. KC war ('85 World Series! St. Louis people, please don't leave! Did I mention that I didn't have Nick screen this post?!)

We had a very poor experience with the reproductive endocrinologist that we saw in Kansas City and then I ended up hearing from other couples who also had bad experiences with this doctor and frankly, we just kinda freaked out.  A lot.  I inadvertently and completely serendipitously found Dr. Silber when doing some research...after reading his bio and seeing his success rates, we got really excited and immediately set up an appointment.  It's certainly been more work to do this out of town, but we don't regret our decision one bit.  We're also phenomenally lucky that Nick's parents (hi, Bill and Rose!) live in St. Louis, so we can stay with them during the treatment (thanks, Bill and Rose!)

Sarah, why are you so hilarious? 

I don't know...maybe it's in the genes (I come from funny stock...funny ha-ha, not funny weird.  Well, I guess that, too), or maybe it's a defense mechanism (Hello, anxiety and discomfort, let me deflect you with my comedy), or maybe I'm just awesome.

Okay, that's all for now...part two coming soon!